The Dragons Of Dragons
by Shoeini
(Mumbai, India )
For Yamini
....
It had to happen, it was nonchalantly coloring my thoughts for few days, I fought with it day and night, yet it appeared in my mind. Like an undefined moment frozen with her thoughts and she slipped into oblivion. She was like the life breathing to the sounds of the breeze, and the staccato of her living was well oriented by the crisscross of the oblivion where she got lost every time, when I started searching for her. Despite the major differences we shared there was thin air of attachment, I was attached to her in the most illogical ways.
She was still Alice a sister of my heart, and I know from the bottom of my heart she needed me from time to time to hold her and comfort her in my arms.
I hated her from the moment I was unable to understand the feelings growing inside me. The fact that ‘Yamini’ was always unparallel seeped in my mind. She always stood like a feudal lord chopping my existence wherever or till whatever heights my soul wanted to reach. Be it with my friends or ‘baba’, I hated myself even more when baba understood ‘Yamini’s silence and asked her to complement on his archive of thesis lying on the intellect table.
Life was a colorful chaos with Yamini around inside my measured hates.
I loved hating everything about her be it her clothes, her bags, her embroidered skirts and the tawdry artifacts which was shipped from all over the world..
She was a lover of Art, it seemed her existence was some kind of an artistic mould, and sometimes she gave me a feeling as if she was receding into a fire which was engulfing her. It stayed with her inside her protecting her and whenever in dire situations she used it to cover her from what was not invited and welcoming in her life.
Every moment spend, with Yamini was like living a life inside the glass castle where everything was transparent, and visible, only I was unable to read her mind and sink deep inside our growing hearts.
Baba loved us both equally but there was something more scandalous and vibrant when Yamini spoke. When she spoke her syllables also echoed behind in dervish monologues, she was as deep as a ravine like an essential river where everything which she perceived or thought of sank inside her. She was like a childhood fairy tale for me like I wanted to read but every time I held her in my mind I got burnt miserably.
I wanted to live a life of my terms and consequences and yet knowingly or unknowingly I was always entangled with Yamini. I was unable to stand and face the heat of the rising sun which everyday, rose from Yamini’s window sill and set there. I was like apathy of dreams. For some my life was turning into a coquettish fiesta. It had to end and
if it had not ended, I decided to end it my way.
Sometimes thoughts were even contradictory and the air traveling around me drenched me with my discolored ambush that was figuring out the lies. I was like an essential lie on the familiarity of my truth. The truth that admired ‘Yamini’ secretly.
I was in my ruins and she was getting perfect day by day.
Her imagination soared, always stood with her and supported her. She portrayed her tangibility with her colors. She was a midnight chime which kept on ringing inside my mind and to avoid her was like a stimulating misery of denial.
Her silence spoke volumes of her mind inside the pause of our prayers and the mundane miracles.Yamini was resolute, strong willed friendly and gorgeous looking female who lived on their legacy of excitements.
She was a world apart yet so much known to me.. a part of me in so many ways yet there was a strange void growing amongst us.
….
Then it happened early morning when I was driving and Yamini was with me as we were attending family get together at a relative’s house. Our car broke down near the highway and it was quite dark. All of a sudden these two men in their bikes came and started teasing us. For the first time, in my life I became aware of the crudity of the men when one fellow tried to pull my hands and I cried out in sheer fear calling Yamini’s name. I was hell scared. I could not imagine what is coming up next, when I saw Yamini pushing the other man on the ground and rushed inside the car and took out some bottles of linseed and turpentine oil and pour on the man who was also taken aback and to my sheer amazement and belief I saw a strange white light covering Yamini.
And there was fire spreading all around. I saw flames emitting from Yamini’s mouth and burning the man. The other man was terrorized and fled to safety.
I stood graved at the moment’s happening and felt awkwardly strange at the incident but deep down my heart I felt great. While driving back home after tracking a gas station all the way I held her hand, a new bond was created and barred me to Yamini. I finally saw her in a new light. The dark clouds had also shifted in my mind and a new ominous sun rose that day in the sky. Everything was beautiful around.
We went back home and never uttered a word on this for few days, whenever I tried to take up the topic she relentlessly avoided it.
After a week I saw a letter lying inside our letter box. It was addressed to Yamini and the back of the envelope I saw a seal of fire breathers association.
I smiled and pictured Yamini in her delectable charm… I got back my Eden!
The End