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How the hell!

by Anik Mookherjee
(Kolkata,india)

It was Saturday evening, probably the best evening for most of the people, because the next day is Sunday. After a long week finally a holiday,but I think differently. I hate Sundays or any holidays. It gives me more time to think about me and my filthy and rotten life. Life has not always been like this. Recently it has taken a bad turn,a turn so bad that it is turning my life upside down.

My name is Joe, and I work in…umm..actually nowhere! Low life scum you may call me. I have debts so much that I am literally swimming in them.

Both my mother and father passed away last year, so you may easily understand that last year has not been easy for me. I have wasted money in the last 2 years like anything. I have left behind not even a single penny. I wasted all my money on poker,bridge,drinks and cigarettes. My dad didn’t give me his money. He said I was “unfit” for the money. Maybe he was right, but he was the reason for my this condition and I can never forgive him for that.

Recently I have taken up a job in the restaurant nearby as a waiter. The small amount of money I get is enough for my daily life,but that won't help me to get out of this debt. I owe money to my friends and they know my condition so they have stopped asking me for the repayment. They know that I will never be able to give them their money back.

Now I am about to talk about the man who maybe the greediest person I have ever met in my life - Mr. Paul Anderson,my landlord. Yes, I have two months of home rent to pay and I have taken money from him and I owe him that, but he never even for a moment let me forget that. He constantly asks me for the money I owe him.

His fat face irritates me every time,he is fat as a mountain. He is exactly the kind of person I love to call ELFF ,Evil Little Fat Folk. He disgusts me.

As I was thinking all this I reached my house. It was 8 o’clock. The staircase was dark,I took out my mobile and switched on the flashlight. The room at the ground floor was of Mr. Anderson’s. As I was passing his room the door opened,and a strangely irritating and deep voice called out.

"Hey, who is there?"

"Its me Joe."

"Oh you! Where the hell have you been?"

"I was at work sir. I don’t get much holidays."

"Oh! When exactly are you planning to give me the house rent?"

"Umm..actually..I will give as soon as possible."

"AS SOON AS POSSIBLE? Hey, listen tomorrow is the last date for you. If you don’t give me the money tomorrow I'll throw you out of the house. Then you will have to worry about finding a new house." He said it so hard that my face was covered with his spit.

I said quickly, “umm sir I have some money I can pay you right now. May I come in sir?”

His eyed gleamed with joy. “Yeah yeah come in gimme what you got.”

I went inside in his room behind him. The room was dark. He put on a light, a bad smell was emitting from the room. It was disgusting,I wished I had my handkerchief so that I could put it over nose. Now let me tell you a secret. I don’t have a single penny in my pocket,I just wanted the man to turn his back on me and I picked up the baseball bat lying at the side of the floor.

The man faced his trunk and took out his key and opened the trunk. Inside the trunk, was some huge bundles of money. This time my eyes gleamed with joy. I had come up with this plan long time ago and now I am going to make this work.

I picked up the

baseball bat over my head and bashed it on the head of the old man,then again,then again and again. Blood covered my shirt and the lifeless body of the old man fell on the floor.

I stood there for some moment,then I drank some water and went in the washroom and peed. I came back to the room and found the dead body lying over there. I took the baseball bat, went to the garden and buried it in the garden. Then I went near the trunk and took as much money as I could (I almost took it all). Then I came up in my room,changed my clothes, rinsed the blood from the clothes and then lit up a cigarette.

I was feeling an awesome kind of relief and I also felt a bit scared but the money I had in my hand, I could go for a five star hotel dinner right now.

After my dinner I went to sleep. This is the worst sleep I have had in years. The sleep was full of nightmares and worst dreams. In my dream I suddenly saw a grave then I saw a handcuff. I woke up with a start.

Then came the moment of horror. I was sleeping on my bed, but when I woke up I saw myself sitting on the chair near my study table and my journal was in front of me. The cold wind was coming in through the window. The lights flickered. I stood up and saw that the window is open but I clearly remember that I have closed the window with my own hands before going to sleep. I began to sweat,I felt someone’s presence in the room. I heard faint whispers and faint walking sounds.

I went in the bathroom and washed my face with cool water and came back in bed and after sometime I slept. This time I had no dreams.
I woke up in the morning with the sound of door knocks. I stood up and opened the door. I wasn’t shocked to see the police inspector coming in my room. I said politely “good morning sir. umm…why are you here?”

"Joe,I'm afraid I have some bad news."

"what sir?"

"Your landlord Mr. Anderson is dead. He died last night."

"Really?..oh damn..its shocking. How did he die sir?"

"Murdered by something blunt on the head."

I smiled inside, but let out a faint scream as if I am really shocked by his death.

“Joe, I have warrant for you and I would like to search your room if you don’t mind.”"

I was a bit scared but then I decided that it won't be a problem, so I said “yes sir..certainly..”

I sat down on the sofa and the two policemen started searching the room. I was tensed but I was sure that they won't find any clue.

I was right,after 45 minutes they gave up and the Inspector said “Joe, you are clear as for now, but if you don’t mind may I see your diary?”

I thought about it sometimes and then said “Yeah sure sir, why not!”

He opened the diary and started turning the pages. Then he suddenly stopped at a page and his face turned serious.

Then the things happened very quickly. He came near me and put out a handcuff and said in a cold voice “Joe, you're under arrest for killing your landlord.”

I was horrified and I shook my head in disbelief. "Hhh..how??..I mean how can you say that?..what proof do you have against me?”

“The proof is in front of you,” said the Inspector.

He handed me the diary. The thing I saw there made me go totally crazy. I have never been so scared in my life.

Inside the diary there it was written with my own hands the full description of the murder and at the end there was my own signature.
My head started to spin. I realized that I was gonna faint. I wanted to scream but all I could manage was “HOW THE HELL!!!…"!

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